How To Reduce School Anxiety in Children When Transitioning Back To School

The summer holidays can be a carefree, fun-packed time of adventure and shared experiences which neither kids nor parents want to end.  It can be very tempting (and rightly so!) to make the most of every day of the school holiday, especially the days which directly precede the back to school date on your calendar.
Remember though, to also do some planning so that the transition back to school can be a seamless, confident one for both you and your kids.
What are the triggers for potential school anxiety which can affect you and your kids?

Causes of Back To School Anxiety in Children & Parents

• feeling rushed
• disorganised
• morning routine is hard to get back into
• difficulties in getting out of bed/out of the house on time
• parents are anxious about the kids being ok
• kids can be anxious about:
  • What will my new teacher be like?
  • Will my new classmates like me?
  • Will I be able to sit with my friends?
  • Who will I sit with at lunch?
  • What if I miss the school bus?
  • Are my clothes ok?
  • Will people laugh at me?
  • What if I don’t understand the lessons?
  • Will I look stupid?

How, as parents can we reduce anxiety in our children to a minimum and facilitate a smooth transition back to school?
If your young person has autism, check out this article too.

Strategies For Reducing Back To School Anxiety In Children

All of us, parents and children alike, thrive on routine and this holds especially true when, as a family, we are faced with the prospect of going back to school.
It is important to look at ways of reducing anxiety around that date and finding a way to make the return to school an exciting, planned and positive experience.

#1. Timeline/Calendar

• Make a timeline together or go shopping and choose a big calendar that you both like.
• Calendars are often available for the academic year and these can be perfect to prepare all of the family for getting back into the swing of school life.
• A timeline can be a great tool in helping all of the household reduce any school anxiety that they might have.
• All kids like to be involved in decisions that effect them and their families.
• Make a timeline that covers the last 2 weeks before school begins and the following 2 weeks when school has started.
• For the last 2 weeks of the holidays, plan in treats and rewards for all of the family AND also plan in challenges which you all must achieve to get the treat or reward.  For example, all of the family must get up 10 minutes earlier each day for the first week of your timeline to be able to enjoy the daily treats that are planned.
• Plan these joint challenges so that they help your kids (and you!) to cope and get used to the morning routine again or getting out of the house on time each day.
• For the first 2 weeks of school, plan in after school activities, activities at the weekend and decide in advance who will pick your kids up from school each day.
• This visual structure, which you can display somewhere for you all to see, will provide a more gentle re-introduction of the back to school routine than if you suddenly panic on the night before school and try to sort yourself and your kids out!
• If you leave everything to the last minute you are creating anxiety in children and yourselves – which is a recipe for disaster on the first day back and will take days or even weeks to pull back.

#2. Make A Morning Schedule

• A visual timetable can be priceless for reducing anxiety and enabling your kids to smoothly transition from holiday to school time.
• Visual timetables are often used in school, so before the end of the school year, find out from them what sort of symbols, words, pictures they use on a daily basis.
• Using familiar visual cues at home can increase confidence in your kids and this will also spill over into reducing any school anxiety they may have.
• If it’s possible, this is a great activity to include your kids in well before the stressors of imminent school, you can design and create a morning schedule together.  You can make this activity fun by using timers to find out how long it takes to get on a school uniform or make a packed lunch or pack a swimming bag.
• When you have worked out the timings of activities that you need to include in your morning schedule, then you can add those timings into it and find out what time you will all have to get up to be ready to leave the house at a set time.
• Allowing kids to take ownership of their morning schedule by working it out with you is a great way to increase their feeling of responsibility, whilst reducing anxiety at the same time.

#3. Golden Check-in Time

• Your kids may well be familiar with ‘Golden Time’, which often happens in schools on a Friday afternoon.  The deal at school is if the kids have got their good work stickers/rewards for the week, then during Golden Time they get to choose their favourite activity.
• We ALL like to feel special and have quality, one-to-one time with the people we love.  Add into your calendar a daily Golden Check-In Time at home with your child.  (You could have two of these if it works, one in the morning and one in the evening).
• Plan a 10-30 minute time with your young person and add it to the calendar.
• Make this time special and choose together what you want to do during this time, examples could be:
  • make and share hot chocolate with marshmallows and chill out on the sofa together (NO mobile phones, NO interruptions!)
  • share a game of footie, take your dog for a walk, go outside and build a den/go to beach
  • have a pamper session – a manicure, pedicure, facial – whatever you both fancy!
  • build a model together, paint together
• The possibilities are endless!
• The most IMPORTANT thing to remember is that while you are enjoying each others’ company, you also chat about how your child is feeling, making sure they are ok, that school is ok and they are emotionally in a good place.

#4. Meet your child’s teacher

• Your child’s teacher will be only too happy to meet up with you to discuss and help with reducing anxiety for your kids.
• Every teacher strives for a happy, productive classroom environment where school anxiety is at a minimum.

Overall, with some planning and forward thinking, the trauma of returning to school can be dealt with effectively and in a positive way.  Taking a bit of time to put some strategies in place can reap dividends for not only your kids but for the whole family too.
Check out our free webinar with Deb on 22nd February about the extent of anxiety in children.

The post Reducing Back To School Anxiety appeared first on Life Skills 4 Kids.

Top 3 tips for super charging your break with sensory boosts for relaxing and recharging

The holiday season is almost here! Maybe you have escaped for an early holiday break? Those of us still at work are just a little jealous, but, we’ll be there soon too. Often we hang in there for holidays, counting down the days, ticking off the to do lists and often we just make it. Sometimes we make it to holidays, our bodies breath a sigh of relief and our bodies crash as soon as we stop as our immune system needs to take a rest and we come down with a cold or flu. I hope this doesn’t happen this holidays for you. So how can we become super relaxed this holiday season, supercharge ourselves ready for being ready to work and serve our family and those we work with again?
As teachers, allied health or medical professionals, we often give and give and give. We are passionate about being our best selves and working to help those we work with. Self care can look like sitting on a beach with a book (which I can’t wait to do next week) but sometimes selfcare can take a little effort and look a little different.

Thinking about relaxation and recharging from a self regulation and sensory perspective

So as teachers or health professionals working with children, we often think and teach children about how they can learn to self regulate, and often we use sensory strategies as actions for children to calm themselves down when they are anxious or nervous, or for helping them to increase alertness in their sensory system if they are tired.
Using a model such as the Just Right Kids model  can help us to visually understand and conceptualise how this might relate to us as adults in helping us to relax during the holidays and supercharging ourselves during our break from work.

As you can see from the model, there are two sides to it. The left hand side talks about how fast or busy our body or our mind is running. Often before a holiday, our bodies are tired, but we use our self talk and cognitive strategies to motivate ourselves, to get ourselves through the next list of tasks we need to complete or through a work party we are really too tired to attend but feel we need or should go to.
The right hand side of the model talks about our emotions and how we are feeling. They are divided in this model as the red zone (anger), blue zone (sad), and the black crash zone. The black crash zone might be entered when it’s 11pm, you still have 20 presents to wrap, you’re exhausted and you’ve just run out of wrapping paper and it’s Christmas Eve.
The focus for our top 3 tips and the secret or clues for how to supercharge our relaxation can be found on the left hand side of the model.
You will see that there are some sensory based clues on the left hand side such as movement, muscle, mouth and deep touch pressure. Theses are strategies for helping us to have uber self care and make the most of our break.

Transforming your body from stress and a “fast” mind to relaxation

1. Deep touch pressure – let’s cut through to the best strategy for most people.
Booking in for a massage (best) or a facial is the best way to get your mind and body from the red “fast” zone to the blue “relaxation” zone. Deep touch pressure is used in therapy with children and as a sensory strategy for adults in mental health units and nursing homes to help calm their nervous system, which gives them feelings of relaxation, calmness, and an increased ability to cope. For myself, having a massage helps me fast track my ability to calm and re-centre myself and saves me a week of holidays. It shoots my nervous system from the fast zone into a more relaxed and calm zone. I’m having a massage this Friday afternoon, because it will slow my mind and thoughts, help me be a happier wife and mother and I’ll be much more fun to be around from day 1 of the holidays.
As you can see on the Just Right Kids Model, being in the blue zone on the left hand side equals being tired and slow in your body. This is being relaxed in mind and body, and a place where we all aim to get to at some point in the holidays.
2. Muscle – resistance. Burning off that stress to be calm and centred.
Using muscle resistance is my second choice for uber relaxing and grounding myself. As you can see on the Just Right Kids Model, muscle is the dark green section. By using resistance activities such as going to a gym class, doing some push ups, Pilates, yoga or stretching or going for a walk, you can calm your body down if you feel your body or your mind is going fast, or if you are feeling tired, you can wake yourself up and make your body, nervous system and mind more alert.
3. Mindfulness – Be Still
Often as I work with children who are busy or hyperactive and struggling with concentration and listening, teaching them to be mindful and still can be one of the hardest but the most rewarding achievement for them. The skill of stopping (both our minds and our bodies) needs to be taught to children and we need to practice it as adults.

• Take some time out for a walk by yourself on the beach or by a river.
• Breathe.
• Sit and be mindful of the sounds around you, notice the details in nature and breathe some more.
• When chatting to family and friends, really take notice of what they are saying, become engrossed in the conversation and really be there in the moment.
• When playing with your children or grandchildren, turn off your smart phone, move onto the floor or next to them and give them 100% attention.

These three strategies are very simple, but often not practiced to the extent that we need.

7 bonus quick cheat methods for feeling fantastic, relaxed and recharged include

1. Eat well. Nutrition is brain and emotions food
2. Drink lots
3. Try a digital detox
4. Cook a new recipe mindfully
5. Catch up with a BFF
6. Take (another) massage of facial, give yourself a mindful facial at home
7. Read a book for fun (not a work book to get ahead).
So here’s to a fantastic relaxing, refreshing and recharging holiday break. Notice on the Just Right Kids model how you are feeling and how your body does relax from the red (busy) and blue (tired) zones and back into the green (just right, refreshed and re-energised zones).
Here’s to a happy holiday!

For more fantastic articles to help you have a great holiday with your kids, check out these helpful articles.

Tips for Surviving Christmas with a Sensory Safe Christmas Day
Reducing Anxiety for End of Term
How to transition from school to home
Tips for reducing anxiety at Christmas
Creating A Sensory Safe Corner At Home
Helping Hyperactive & Busy Kids
Tips for Travelling with Children
Fireworks Survival Guide
Minimising Tantrums at the Shops

The post How to Relax for the Holidays and Supercharge your Break appeared first on Life Skills 4 Kids.

What is a sensory safe Christmas and the key tips for surviving Christmas Holidays?

Not long now until Christmas. Santa’s can be found everywhere (I almost bowled one over yesterday at our local shopping centre!), and in the weeks leading up to Christmas, it seems as if everyone is on the pre-Christmas crazy treadmill. Many of us are trying to survive the end of school activities, concerts and assemblies, let alone thinking about how to survive Christmas. This time of year can be very overwhelming for children from a sensory perspective, and taking time to think about strategies for a sensory safe Christmas and holiday season can reap benefits!

So why bother to think about a sensory safe Christmas?

At the end of the year when kids and adults are tired from the year’s activities, our sensory systems are tired too, and it’s much easier for us to “tip over the edge”. From a sensory perspective, when we are tired and pushed into doing activities outside our normal routine, we can feel a little anxious at times, or we might be pushed into feelings of frustration and more irritable that usual and reacting with less patience than usual. As adults we might be able to hold this in a little more, but for children, the emotional impatience and “behavioural” aspects may overflow like a waterfall! (Just ask my admin assistant and myself after our morning routines or explosions with our kids just this morning!)
When we experience intense emotions, such as at Christmas time, they can “overflow” in many different ways including:
Physical: nausea, headaches, fatigue or pain
Emotional: anxious, mad, scared, sad, overwhelmed
Thoughts: might be racing, we might forget more things, confusion and difficulty problem solving
Behaviours: that might bubble over might include needing more time alone and isolating self, crying, yelling or screaming, meltdowns, or overeating.

Think about Christmas day or holiday events from a new perspective

1. Friends pop in unexpectedly Christmas afternoon (unexpectedness)
2. Rather than being in a normal week routine or school and work, we start the holiday routine and go to the park and beach a lot more (novelty)
3. At the fireworks there are lots of crowds, noise and fun things to look at, and then the noise of the fireworks (increased intensity)
4. At a BBQ for a street party there are lots of new people to meet and people we haven’t seen for ages. There are lots of new names to remember and new kids to play with (complexity)
5. Aunty Eva comes for Christmas. She brings with her tensions and past family politics. Everyone is playing happy families, but the kids know you don’t get on (incongruity)
6. There are lots of trips to the beach, but 4yo Jack remembers he can’t tolerate touching the sand (negative associations)
7. A visit to the local fair is on the agenda for the older kids, but Abby hates going on the rides and all the people make her feel on edge (fast past movement, sound and too much to take in visually)
These events all have qualities of alerting stimulation. Yes, they are fun, are exciting events, and things we generally look forward to over the holiday season, but they can also put our sensory systems into an overwhelmed zone, which can trigger anxious thoughts as well as negative behaviour.
The pressure of families meeting up for the first time in a long time and the expectation of playing happy families amidst the stress of life can also push us into the anxious zone.

How to create a sensory safe Christmas and tips for surviving Christmas and the holidays

1.   Build a holiday calendar. This is great for parents to keep track of what’s happening, as well as for children to know what’s coming up from day to day. Download our LS4K Transition Holiday Calendar for Dec Jan Feb.docx.
2.   If you are travelling, build in some familiarity for your child by packing some of their favourite toys, blanket and pillow. The smell and feel of your own pillow can help you get to sleep easier and gives a sense of familiarity and safety when not in your usual surroundings.
3.   Talk about the holiday events with positive associations. For example, remember when we went camping last year and how fun it was to chill out in the hammock and swim in the lake?
4.   Encourage your child to document the things they do, the people they see and where they go. If you are travelling, visit information centres and collect pamphlets and they can create a scrapbook or journal with pictures of places they have seen.
5.   If going to the shops is a trigger for your children with the busy-ness or sounds being too much, try and go to the park before and/ or after. Using their muscles and using movement to fill their sensory systems can make them calmer before you get to the shops and then help them recover afterwards.
6.   Have a time limit for how long you will stay at the shops so the kids know how long they need to hold it together for – and make sure you stick to this timeframe, otherwise it might all fall apart in the middle of a supermarket aisle.
7.   Before sit down meals, encourage active play outside if possible. This fills their nervous system, gets some of the wiggles and energy out and will make sitting down to eat easier.
8.   At meal time, if they have wiggly legs, encourage them to push their legs against the sides of the chair to help calm their body.
9.  When visiting others, work out a code phrase or word that your child can tell you if they aren’t coping well. EG, if feeling anxious or wiggly, they could say “Mum, I’m feeling I’m in the yellow zone, what can I do to feel better?”
10. When you arrive, chat to your host and ask if there’s a quiet place that your child can hang out if they need some quiet time. Show you child and give them permission to come here if they need to, and leave a bag of favourite books or toys in this space as a calming activity if they need it (and this will also add an element of familiarity which can help reduce anxiety).
Remember, if your child it finding it hard to manage his or her behaviour this Christmas and holiday season, have a brain storm about what the triggers might be and brainstorm how you can make your current situation and environment to be :
– Calmer
– More familiar
– More consistent
– Neutral
– Create positive associations
– Slow the pace of the day, decrease expectations
– Change to a quieter activity with less sounds, movement or visual input
– Revert to simpler activities that your child enjoys.
Articles for more information on surviving the holidays.

1. • Reducing Anxiety for End of Term
   • How to transition from school to home
   • Tips for reducing anxiety at Christmas
   • Creating A Sensory Safe Corner At Home
   • Helping Hyperactive & Busy Kids
   • Tips for Travelling with Children
   • Fireworks Survival Guide
   • Minimising Tantrums at the Shops

The post Tips for Surviving Christmas with a Sensory Safe Christmas Day appeared first on Life Skills 4 Kids.

What effect does this have on children’s anxiety?

The change in a child’s routine can be an underlying factor in

• Exacerbating the effects of tiredness
• Create feelings of being unsettled with a routine that is changing most days
• Enhance negative behaviour.

I have often found in my practice and with my own children that creating a calendar of the last week or two of school, the holidays and the first week or two of school has really helped in:

• reducing any underlying anxiety,
• helps with improve feelings of self control and helping a child be grounded
• allows children to feel more empowered about what’s coming up.

Including children in the planning process and in writing on the calendar also really helps children to be a part of the process and feel more in control.

Want help in reducing anxiety at Christmas time?

Join me, Deb Hopper for our FREE workshop on Sensory Strategies for Parents to Survive the End of School Year and Christmas Season
Dec 12, 2017. For more information about the free online workshop please see – https://www.lifeskills4kids.com.au/online-workshops/
[embedyt] https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=H0sEnc3fogQ[/embedyt]

Want a free planner for your child for this school holidays?

Download our calendar template here: LS4K Transition Holiday Calendars for Dec-Jan-Feb

The post Reducing Anxiety for End of Term appeared first on Life Skills 4 Kids.

• We all like to know what is happening in our lives and kids are no exception.
• There will be some students who will benefit from having a visual timetable of the day up at the front of the classroom. (I would recommend this begins as soon as you go ‘off-timetable’.)
• Anxious students or those who have extra needs will also benefit from having an individual daily timetable to help them make sense of their day.
• If you have students who need a lot of structure, it is a good idea to plan for this at the beginning of the year.
• To enable kids to cope with the unexpected, introduce a “Wow” or “Surprise” visual symbol throughout the year – so that they get used to the expect the unexpected whenever they see this symbol.
• For all students, it will help to have a weekly Newsletter that can be sent home with them on a Friday, so that the parents can then prepare them for the following week.

#2. Student Involvement In The ‘Fun’ Timetable

• Provide all students with choices whenever possible, so that they have maximum input in what they think is fun.
• There will be some students who prefer peace and quiet to a noisy party or movie. If you can, provide some options for students to choose from and allow them the freedom to create their own fun time.

#3. Adequate Transition

• Kids can become very stressed towards the end of the year because they know they will probably be moving classes, have different teachers or be moving schools.
• An adequate period of transition to allow students to explore their new environment, meet their new teachers and classmates and reassure themselves that they will be ok is vitally important.

#4. Maintain home schedule

• It is really tempting at this time of year to not only relax the rules and routine at school, but also do the same at home.
• Encourage parents to keep the home environment routines as normal as possible; explain that this helps their young people feel safe and secure, so that they will be able to face challenges more easily.

#5. Devise a plan to see friends over the holidays

• A lot of kids feel anxious about missing their friends when they are not at school.
• Before the kids leave school, encourage parents and students to make plans for getting together and keeping in contact with their friends.
• This can be especially problematic if the young person has a birthday in the holidays – there could be anxiety around nobody coming to the party – get your invites out before the kids break up if this is the case!

#6. Make a Seasonal Bucket List

• Both kids and adults can make a seasonal bucket list for the holidays.
• Agree that if it’s a realistic, each person will be able to do at least one thing from their top 3.
• Encourage all of the family and friends to look forward to the holiday.

#7. Mindful Meditation/Visualisation

• Introduce a short daily session of relaxation as a coping strategy. Dim the lights, encourage your students to close their eyes and relax as you do some simple deep breathing and visualisation exercises with them.

**Most importantly be kind and give everyone some extra understanding**
Students, teachers and parents all get tired and stressed at this time of year – remember to give everyone a bit of extra patience and love!

The post How To Make End of Year Routine Changes Easier for Kids appeared first on Life Skills 4 Kids.

Written by Deb Hopper

Published in

Download your Printable here: Helping kids with homework.

Most children bring varying degrees of homework home as early as Kindergarten through to the end of high school. Encouraging and teaching children how to settle and ground themselves after a full day of learning, can be trying and emotional for both parents and your child. In GHGTM September issue, we talked about the importance of understanding the best times of the day when your child has higher energy levels and so choose the best times to encourage homework. This could be straight after school, after some exercise or down time, later at night or even early in the morning.
Help to create a learning space.

This month, we look at six top tips for helping a child settle into homework.

The ways to help a child settle into homework may include:
1. Sending the kids outside to play for 20 minutes.
Giving them time for a run around, a swing in the backyard, climbing a tree or visiting a park on the way home from school really fills their nervous system, which can help them get ready for homework.
If your child attends after school care, talk to the carers and ask how much movement and active play time your child participates in. If they are choosing more sedentary activities, liaise with the staff for ways for them to encourage movement and active play while in their care. This will make homework time easier for you.
2. Have some warm up games available for your child.
Have some playdough, plasticine or therapy putty available for them to play with while you are putting dinner on. This won’t feel like homework for your child, it will help to strengthen their hands ready for writing and it can be quite therapeutic and calming.
3. Talk to your child about what kind of environment they find easier to concentrate in.
For some it will be silence, for others it will be with background music. Take interest in helping your child to understand that everyone is different and suggest trialling different set ups while they find out what works for them.
4. Set up a comfortable physical environment with your child.
Create a comfortable and organised place for them to do their homework. This might be in their bedroom, at the breakfast bar, or at a small table in the living room close to the family’s activities.
The best space will be different for children of different ages. Younger children love to be near their parents, whereas older children like to have their own space and need more space for setting up books and study materials. If you need to buy a chair or desk lamp, involve your child in going to the store to help choose one.
Provide helpful organising tools such as pen holders in trays and help teach them how to use it. You have many more years’ experience in being organised. Take a little time and share your ideas with your child.
5. Make sure there is good lighting and that the chair provides good posture with feet touching the floor.
It may be helpful to have a foot rest or smaller table and chair for younger children.
6. Encourage your child to have a drink of water before starting homework and have their drink bottle on the desk while doing homework.
Having regular sips of water keep them hydrated for improved concentration but the sipping action also helps the nervous system to keep calm and the brain alert.
By using a combination of setting goals and looking after a child’s sensory needs, you will support them to be able to start, concentrate and complete homework time with much less fuss, making the evening more fun!

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Download your Printable here: Helping kids with homework.

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Deb Hopper… Occupational Therapist, author, workshop presenter. Deb is passionate about empowering parents and educators to understand the underlying reasons of why children struggle with behaviour, self-esteem and sensory processing difficulties. A practicing Occupational Therapist, she understands the daily struggles that children, parents and teachers face.
Deb is the co-author of the CD Sensory Songs for Tots, and author of Reducing Meltdowns and Improving Concentration: The Just Right Kids Technique. The Just Right Kids Technique Model can be downloaded at: http://www.lifeskills4kids.com.au/just-right-kids-model/
You can contact Deb on 02 6555 9877. She is available for clinic and phone/ Skype consultations.

The post Helping Kids With Homework (Part 2) appeared first on Life Skills 4 Kids.

Are you looking for a way to help children reduce meltdowns?

Focus better in school?

Better understand their feelings, emotions and self-regulation?

If you are searching for the answer to these questions, you have found them in this book!

This book explains how the Just Right Kids Technique can help you to teach your child to understand, recognise and learn to control their emotions and behaviour.

Designed to fit into busy schedules, the concepts in the technique are easy to understand and the strategies can be implemented straight away. Through this fun, play-based approach to learning children will gain valuable life skills that will help them to feel ‘just right’ more of the time.

Reducing Meltdowns and Improving Concentration - The Just Right Kids Technique (eBook) quantity

Add to cart

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